Alice H. Lahoda

Published in The Writing Cooperative

·Pinned

How to Write ‘Funny Anger’ (Not ‘Angry Anger’)

Why humor editors love the former and reject the latter — As a comedian and editor for The Belladonna, a popular humor publication on Medium, I read and write a lot of angry humor pieces. But for every terrific piece of satire, I read at least 4–5 attempts that fall flat. Why? Because they aren’t funny. One of the best ways…

Writing

8 min read

How to Write ‘Funny Anger’ (Not ‘Angry Anger’)

Pinned

My 2021 Submission Stats

Because getting published is a numbers game. — This was a really good year for me. With a few small exceptions, 2021 is the first time I really wrote, submitted, and published short humor. I wrote almost every day (especially from January — June), and I got pretty good incredibly quickly. …

Comedy

7 min read

Published in Slackjaw

·Pinned

QUIZ: Is This A Quote From My 5-Year-Old Or An Old Timey Expression That Fell Out Of Style?

Tyler is in his Don Rickles phase right now. —

Humor

4 min read

QUIZ: Is This A Quote From My 5-Year-Old Or An Old Timey Expression That Fell Out Of Style?

Published in The Belladonna Comedy

·Pinned

If This Cartoon Lady Animal Doesn’t Have Human Breasts, How Will Men Know If We Wanna Fuck It?

PETITION: We need a set of honking knockers to hold our attention! — “[Malcolm D. Lee], the director of ‘Space Jam: A New Legacy,’ has ‘reworked’ Lola Bunny’s role for the reboot — claiming he wasn’t comfortable with the ‘very sexualized’ way she came off in the original back in 1996.” — TMZ, 3/4/21 Petition for Malcolm D. Lee to DRAW TITTIES ON…

Comedy

3 min read

If This Cartoon Lady Animal Doesn’t Have Human Breasts, How Will Men Know If We Wanna Fuck It?

Published in Slackjaw

·4 days ago

An Age-By-Age Guide To Explaining Steven Tyler To Your Child

Steven Tyler has a pet raccoon named Bandit. Why? I don’t know. Nobody knows why that man does anything. — INFANT At this age, your little one’s soft, underdeveloped brain is physically incapable of comprehending the complex fascinations and horrors of rock n’ roll powerhouse Steven Tyler, so talk about him to your spouse as you normally would, no explanation necessary: “Hey hon, wanna make like Steven Tyler and have sex…

Humor

4 min read

An Age-By-Age Guide To Explaining Steven Tyler To Your Child

Published in The Belladonna Comedy

·5 days ago

Back In My Day, TiK ToK Was A Ke$ha Song

Now look at you kids, wasting your time with West Elm Calebs and seamless transitions. Not me, though. I just complain about the youths on Twitter and watch thousands of my brain cells disappear forever with each new round of discourse. LAST WEEK ON THE BELLADONNA

Writing

3 min read

Back In My Day, TiK ToK Was A Ke$ha Song

Published in Slackjaw

·Jan 17

Rules For Chekhov’s Other Guns

If you hang three guns on the wall in Act One, all three of them must enroll in film school by Act Two. — Chekhov’s Gun If you hang a gun on the wall in Act One, it must go off by Act Two. Chekhov’s Chekhov’s Gun If you hang a poster with the Rule of Chekhov’s Gun on the wall in Act One, a college class of pretentious film students must discuss the merits and drawbacks of Chekhov’s…

Comedy

3 min read

Published in The Belladonna Comedy

·Jan 16

WOWOW BELLA DONNA LMFAO | Wordle 69 4/20

If this newsletter is sent to Spam, first of all RUDE, and secondly… fair. The world is chaos right now, so let’s just play Wordle and catch up on what’s new in The Belladonna this week! LAST WEEK ON THE BELLADONNA

Humor

3 min read

WOWOW BELLA DONNA LMFAO | Wordle 69 4/20

Published in The Belladonna Comedy

·Jan 9

NEW Year, NEWsletter

OLD us, NEWt Gingrich can go to hell, there was an OLD woman who lived in a shoe, NEW Balance sneakers are every dad’s go-to footwear, nothing gOLD can stay, buy a piNEWood candle and put it in a candlehOLDer, send your NEW submissions to the OLD Belladonna email address…

Comedy

4 min read

Published in The Belladonna Comedy

·Jan 4

Who Said It: A Dog or Someone Who Doesn’t Have the COVID Vaccine in 2022?

“BARK!!! …has amazing immune-boosting properties.” — “I don’t have the COVID vaccine. Oh and the year is 2022 by the way, just in case you wanted that information for some reason.” Answer: 40% of humans worldwide who haven’t received the COVID vaccine, even if they desperately want it & a dog if it knew about COVID and could talk. “My 2022 New Year’s resolution is to do what I want, and screw anyone who tries to stop me!”

Comedy

3 min read