Lest We Forget the Horrors

This was a really good year for me. With a few small exceptions, 2021 is the first time I really wrote, submitted, and published short humor. I wrote almost every day (especially from January — June), and I got pretty good incredibly quickly. …

Lola Bunny in Space Jam (1996). Fair use, Wikipedia.

“[Malcolm D. Lee], the director of ‘Space Jam: A New Legacy,’ has ‘reworked’ Lola Bunny’s role for the reboot — claiming he wasn’t comfortable with the ‘very sexualized’ way she came off in the original back in 1996.”

TMZ, 3/4/21

Petition for Malcolm D. Lee to DRAW TITTIES ON…

Image of Steven Tyler by Gage Skidmore, altered using Canva Pro

INFANT

At this age, your little one’s soft, underdeveloped brain is physically incapable of comprehending the complex fascinations and horrors of rock n’ roll powerhouse Steven Tyler, so talk about him to your spouse as you normally would, no explanation necessary:

“Hey hon, wanna make like Steven Tyler and have sex…

Image created on imgflip.com, altered via Canva Pro

Chekhov’s Gun

If you hang a gun on the wall in Act One, it must go off by Act Two.

Chekhov’s Chekhov’s Gun

If you hang a poster with the Rule of Chekhov’s Gun on the wall in Act One, a college class of pretentious film students must discuss the merits and drawbacks of Chekhov’s…

Image created via Canva Pro

“I don’t have the COVID vaccine. Oh and the year is 2022 by the way, just in case you wanted that information for some reason.”

Answer: 40% of humans worldwide who haven’t received the COVID vaccine, even if they desperately want it & a dog if it knew about COVID and could talk.

“My 2022 New Year’s resolution is to do what I want, and screw anyone who tries to stop me!”

Answer: A dog who refuses to share his delicious new bone.

“My 2022 New Year’s resolution is to mock anyone who disagrees with me because it makes me feel better about my own shitty decisions.”

Answer: ̶A̶ ̶d̶o̶g̶ Just kidding! It’s Alex Jones, who once served…

Alice H. Lahoda

humorist. managing editor of The Belladonna. more: alicelahoda.com. support my writing with a referred Medium membership: angryangryalice.medium.com/membership

Get the Medium app

A button that says 'Download on the App Store', and if clicked it will lead you to the iOS App store
A button that says 'Get it on, Google Play', and if clicked it will lead you to the Google Play store